That Rude Girl

Old blog from New Years when I decided to quit blogging. But I have since decided to return.

I am glad 2008 is over. I mean seriously I think that was the shittiest year in all of my existence on this earth. I am sooooo looking forward to 2009 and a fresh start. And with that fresh start I regret to inform you that That Rude Girl will sent to the archives. I simply have too many talents to just choose one. And I have evolved. 2009 is a year for Change. And quite frankly since Obama has been elected President I have not been pissed about all that much. Please continue to pass through the site and send the link to your friends as it will remain up. Although, I am not presently adding any fresh Rudeness, I still have lots of unposted blogs on my computer that I will be adding this week before I bid my final adieu. Thank you for all your support, comments, encouragement, and most of ALL your vision! Finally there are people like me who see the world as it truly is.  Please feel free to add me as a friend on Myspace and/or joining my Facebook group to keep in touch. My e-mail is thatrudegirl@gmail.com.  Thanks again for reading. Godspeed!

Now I must reflect on 2008. Although the year was again one of the crappiest I have ever lived through. It was a year of phenomenal change and revelation. Here are a few thoughts and things I  have learned as I reflect:

I have learned that a crappy economy, a pointless war, millions of people loosing their homes to foreclosure, and a missed Season of 24 due to a writers strike is finally enough to make even thee most racist rednecks move past racial barriers and strive for change.

OJ Simpson is a DAMN idiot! I mean seriously after getting off for murder he should’ve known that even a light offense like J-walking would result in the death penalty in his case. Did he really think he would get off …again….for ANYTHING! Especially, since the late great Johnny Cochran is no longer here to have his back. Yeah …The Juice has lost it.

The 5 least stressful jobs of 2008, which you can obtain with minimum qualifications, are:

5) Librarian

4)Lawn Mower

3)Crowd Control at Radio Shack (Seriously, how are they still open?)

2)Janitor

1)Vice President

Contributing to any political campaign is a form of Gambling

The government does not care about you …unless you are a bank. So therefore if you find yourself lending out 10 bucks to your cousin Ray. Incorporate yourself as a financial institution then maybe Uncle Sam will give a damn.

Due to restaurants being required to list health facts on their menu, seeing how many calories a Dunkin Donut contains before you buy it… Really does stop you from wanting it. So now I just send my friends in the store to buy it for me instead.

All the cereal boxes, orange juice cartons, and laundry detergent containers are secretly shrinking every year…but the prices continue to rise. I will continue to give these General Mills, Nabisco, Proctor and Gamble bastards a piece of my mind until they bring back the 17.8 oz cereal box for 2.49.

The MTA is as crooked as Quasimodo’s back.  Raising the fare …AGAIN! Are you serious?!!! What if these assholes were regulated by a government official whose value’s weren’t corrupted, and who wasn’t taking bribes under the table then maybe , these asshole could operate on an actual BUDGET! And stop robbing us of our money, like hoodlums used to do back in the 80’s on the 5 train.  Another idea to raise money would be to rent out advertising space on bus drivers uniforms. Like how NASCAR drivers wear those cool jackets with the Wonder Bread logos. That sounds like a winner to me.

I find it oh so interesting how gas mysteriously drops to record low prices after the first consumer hover car is unveiled. 

I find it oh so interesting how gas prices went up to a record high a few months before your president who has his fortuned tied into the oil industry will lose his job.

I’ve learned that my brother was the one who ate the piece of pie that was left for me, with my name on it, in the back of my grandmother refrigerator.

I’ve learned that being passive aggressive and pouring a bottle of colon sweep into his chocolate milk to get my revenge is far more fun than a confrontation.

And finally… I’ve learned that if I can influence people by sitting on my ass, and doing absolutely nothing in front of my computer, imagine the influence I’d have if I really got off my ass and into the world.  In the words of my favorite Rhino Smoochy, “You can’t change the world… but you can make a dent.”

HAPPY 2009 EVERYONE!

Posted by thatrudegirl at 09:42 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

11- 5-08

I am so excited that Obama was elected president. I never thought I would see the day that social barriers could be broken at this magnitude. And at a much needed time. Things can't possibly be any shittier in America, thanks to 8 Years of President Idiot-face Bush. And we really need Obama's leadership, and optmism to get our country back on the right track. 

But along with the renewed Black Pride, the hope, the optmism, the sense of Change....comes ignorant actions and remarks from my white peers.

I am alreday tired of her white peers coming up to her and dap it up as if suddenly we are cool.

I'm tire of whites people telling me "Congratulations!"

I am tired of people saying he will be assasinated.

I am tired of the white girl across from me trying to convince me that she voted for Obama..when I know she really voted McCain.

I am tired of people saying he is only half black. (His skin is the color of mine...he's black)

I'm just tired of all the rcaial comments. Its not needed. White people stop trying to convince me you arent racist. I know most of you aren't. I know you just want whats best for our country and your family. So stop bringing it up. And don't dare think that this makes up for slavery or anything else.  Just accept that this man is the best Man for the position PERIOD.

Posted by thatrudegirl at 09:34 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

11-4-08

I woke up at a quarter to 6am today, and I can honestly say that I have never been that excited
to wake up that early. I was jumping around my house and singing "Rock the Vote" (a song I made up to the tune of "Rock the Boat Baby")  I put on my sweater, made my hot coco, and took my folding camper chair and was prepared to hit the polls.

As I was walking down the street the polling station I met up with my cousins who were also going to vote. We approached the entrance of the polling place in amazement. For the first time EVER there was a line. The line went out the front door. We kept walking looking for the end of the line. The line went out the front door and down the block. We kept walking to get towards the end, and discovered that the line went out the front door, down the block, and around the corner. "WOWZERS!" I exclaimed (the only black girl who says "wowzers" I know) But I wasn't the least bit discouraged. I was excited. I was happy that so many people had woke up so early to vote like me. I was proud to be on such a long line, and waiting to make history.

We took our place in the back of the line. I unpacked my chair, and noticed an elderly lady who just joined the line behind us. I offered her my seat. She was very thankful. I stood. I stood and talked amongst other people in line about mostly black issues, and how the polls were understaffed this morning. But eventually the line started moving.  And just when I was more proud than I had ever been while we are standing in line about 250 people deep..... a crack headish looking man walks by my cousin and asks, "Hey brother what's this line for? They giving something out?" That did it. There goes the pride. It was nice while it lasted. But a woman on the line replied, "They giving out change!"

A police officer walked around the large crowd. I expected him to start searching all the young black males for drugs, and weapons. But to my surprise the officer was very peaceful, and also drastically outnumbered. I saw my neighbor exiting the polls. I gave him a high-five and asked "You Baracked the vote?!" He told us that he voted for Harry Potter, and the Wizards of Waverly Place. I then demmaned my high-five back.

I stood for 2 hours smiling and and joking. Giving high-fives to random black people as they left the voting station. I sang songs my "rock the vote" as well as "Moving on up", I gave a shout out to my cousin Troy who was a 1st time voter! After I embarassed him enough we made it inside. I showed my ID (which no one had ever asked me for any of the other times I voted), signed my name... and I went behind the curtains to make the magic happen. I double and tripple checked my votes before I pulled down the casting lever. I know I can read, but I just wanted to be super sure. You know? So that was my moring. I left the polling site and as soon as I steppoed out side I cheered. A few other people smiled at me, some gave a look like , "that bitch is crazy", and others nodded in approval because they could reltae to my joy. It's going to be a great day everyone. I can't wait until tonight.

I'm not telling you who I voted for...otherwise it won't come true. But I will hint.."Change is in the Air"

Posted by thatrudegirl at 09:27 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

10-23-08

I wrote this after watching the Democratic National Convention in August  :          

I had a high school teacher named William Zimmerman. Mr. Zimmerman taught American History, as well as US Government. He was a profound historian; graduated with honors from Michigan State University, moved to New York to experience "Big City Life" and pursue his dreams of teaching. He was passionate about his love for history and his country. As his students we would ask questions, and he would provide us with an honest and insightful answer. Mr. Zimmerman was funny, and led the class into great discussions. That's why all the students loved him (Except for my friend Teisha who once reffered to him as "Blue Eyed Devil", after he reprimanded her for frequent tardiness…but that's a different story).

I remembered the discussion we had in class on this particular day.  We were discussing what factors that race and gender play when it comes to politics.  We discussed the changes that stemmed from women being given the right to vote, as well as the progress of African Americans when they were given the right to vote, the percentage of women, and minority members of congress. Then we talked about the probability of having an African American or female president. The students shared our thoughts openly for 40 minutes. Then Mr. Zimmerman concluded with his own opinion. (Which we always held with high esteem) He said, "We will not have a black president in our lifetime. There's a better chance of electing a white woman, than ever having a Black president. That's just the way it is."  His blue eyes darted at the corner where I sat along with the 3 other black adolescents in my class, and pierced my spirit.  Although I had no interest in politics, and no desire to ever run for president (I was secretary of the astronomy and physics club, and that bull shit was time consuming. Forget being president of the country), my heart still began to sink. My little dark corner fell silent. The bell rang, and I had shrugged it off by the time I arived at my next class. I never really gave it much thought again until last night.

            I was sitting on my sofa, flipping through a magazine when I glanced at the time. "Oh shoot!", I exclaimed. "I hope I didn't miss it!" I turned on the television and flipped to PBS just in time to see them introducing the key note speaker of the evening; The Democratic Party Nominee for President of the United States of America, Senator Barack Obama.  I watched the brief video biography of his life, and was amazed at how much I had in common with this man. I was surprised to learn that he stemmed from very humble beginnings, was born to an unwed single mother, had grandparents who played an active role in his life, lived below the poverty line, made it through school, but struggled paying for an education. He endured the pain of watching a loved one loose a battle with cancer.  And He also found love and got married, and started a family of his own. And after overcoming his obstacles and accomplishing so much, he doesn't go for a high end job, or sell out his soul for a corner office and sick stock options. He goes back to a community that needs him, to ensure other people who are in a similar position that he was in, have the same opportunities that he had. He spoke about a vision for our country, and for Americans. And as he was concluding his speech a tear fell from my eye. I thought about my grandmother who died before she could see this historic day. And I smiled to myself and said, "I want this man to be our president."

You see we as Americans have gotten it all backwards. Look at the presidents we have elected in the past. Many destined to be president from a long lineage of Politicians; many of them born into wealth; many of them without a care in the world, and many run for president because they can simply afford to buy their way into the white house. We have been electing presidents who had an ideal life. A life we coveted but seeming are incapable of obtaining. And with every president who fit these criteria, the average person found their life to be more difficult with each year they were in office.

That's where we had it wrong. How can a president end poverty, when they don't understand what its like to be poor? How can a president help finance an education, when they don't understand what it's like to worry about paying for school? How can a president help single parent families, when they grew up in an ideal two parent household? How can a president provide an adequate healthcare system, when they don't know what it is? Now none of the presidents in the past 20 years have experience dealing with any of these issues at first hand. (With the exception of President Clinton who too came from humble beginnings; and if you note the years that  Clinton was in office you will remember that those were times of great economic prosperity for our country.) I am familiar with all of these things. I was born to a single unwed parent. I grew up with my grandparents, I struggled to pay for quality education.  My grandmother tried to fight cancer, while we had to fight for her health insurance.  I worry about providing for a family.  Most of you are familiar with at least one if not all of those things. Most of America is dealing with these issues, and Senator Obama lived through all of these issues. So I don't understand how people label him a minority in this presidential election. Because quite frankly in the way that matters the most, he is the majority.  He is someone who is like all of us. I want a president who can relate to me, and who can say they have walked in my shoes. And only someone who has lived it, can devise a plan to change it. We definitely need to make that "change".

So it is with great pleasure that I proudly endorse Senator Barack Obama for President of the United States of America. Now get out and spread the word. And make sure you vote. Our ancestors didn't go through all of that for nothing. They went through it so we wouldn't have to. Now vote!

Oh.....And to my dear high school teacher Mr. William Zimmerman from Michigan StateUniversity,  who taught at MCSM High School, the Jack Tripper looking guy, who wears pink shirts, with preppy sweaters…  I just want to say. You were terribly mistaken. And Teisha was right for calling you a BLUE EYED DEVIL!!!! You Dream crushing Bastard!  OBAMA '08

Posted by thatrudegirl at 09:24 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

 I finally got around to doing my laundry today. I hate doing laundry I mean hate doing laundry.  I put it off until the last possible moment. Until  I have NO clothes left in my closet. Until it's either do laundry, or go out naked the next day.  Yeah I will admit, I'm the type of person who buys new underwear, rather than be subject to the wash.

In fact in an effort to avoid doing laundry I sort my clothes into 3 categories. I don't do the typical sorting whites, and colored. That sounds hella racist if you ask me. Like something the Grand Wizard of the KKK made up to create subconscious racists.  Instead I separate my clothes as follows: Whites, dirty, and filthy

 White clothes - usually consists of underwear, and tshirts. (Which I can easily purchase a new pack of 5 from Walmart for 5 bucks.) So those probably  won't get touched.

 Dirty clothes - usually consist of thing like a t-shirt I wore for a few hours on a 60 degree day, and wasn't involved in any strenuous activity. Those clothes will more than likely be worn again. *

 Filthy clothes – usually consists of Dirty clothes that have been worn a 2^nd time, gym clothes, socks, clothes with stains, sex funked bed sheets, and draws.  The filthy pile MUST BE WASHED! 

*Jeans are the exception to the dirt clothes rule. If you put them on as is they are okay. But if they are wrinkled then forget it. You can't iron dirty jeans. When you iron previously worn jeans they get that shiny look. You know the one I'm talking about. They look like a pair of patent leather jeans or some shit.

So I went to the Laundromat. I'd probably be more inclined to do laundry if I had my own washer and dryer. Like when I lived I California. I had a washer and dryer in my unit. I washed every day. It was fun. Put a load in when I came home from work. Put them in the dryer before I went to bed. And in the morning. BAM! Clean clothes. SWEET!

 Now I do have a laundry room in my building, but the machines are a piece of shit, not to mention extremely over priced, there are bad ass little niglettes that play in the laundry room, and steal the carts, plus I think some of the PR tenants leave roaches in the machines after they wash their clothes. So I go to the Wascomat. 

I haven't done laundry in so long. I saw clothes that I forgot I had. I'm goingt through my pile of clothes saying "Wow! This is a nice shirt! I forgot about this" I almost thought I pulled the clothes out of someone elses dryer by istake. You know it's bad when its fall, and you are washing clothes that you havent worn since last winter. Yeah. Damn shame.  Anyways, I don't like using that cheap crap. Fab, Ajaz, Dynamo, Brand -X.  It  all makes me itch. Not to mention it makes the water look hella dingy. I plurge on detergent, and use Tide with Febreeze.  Along with Swavitel! That shit is way better than Downy!!! And cheaper. Swavitel  is arguably the best thing to ever come from Mexico. (Besides carne asada fries)  The laundry I go to has free dry. So naturally I OD on the dryer mode. Occasionally I burn myself when taking out my jeans or sweaters. Especially if that zipper or metal button touches your hand. I screamed like a damn fool in that place. "IT BURNS!!!!!!!"   After folding up my clothes (half assed)  I left for home and vowed never to let my clothe pile up like that again. As you can guess… I probably will.

Posted by thatrudegirl at 09:19 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

My mom invited me to go to Red Lobsters with them for her boyfriends birthday. I haven't eaten Red Lobsters in years. Ever since Bisquik started selling the cheesy garlic biscuits. I really have no reason to go. The biscuits are the best part. Now I can make them myself.  so who needs the extra headache.  Red Lobster is where every Black person goes  for Birthdays, Graduations, Anniversaries, Mother's day,  etc.  And I don't like to be around those type of Black people. Those are usually the type of Black people who think Red Lobster is a fancy restaurant. (They really NEED to get out more!!!)  

So anyway since I was in pretty jovial mood I agreed to go out with them. I figured it would give me something interesting to write about. And boy did it ever!!!  We got there and it was the usual scene on a Saturday night. 30minute wait. The bar was overflowing with loud middle aged women, and their dates telling them they need to finish their drink. Little P.R  kids  tapping on the lobster tank with their greasy ass fingers, as the father snatches the "Bo Bo" (pacifier) out the 4 year old girls mouth and threatened to drop it in the lobster tank. She starts screaming until the Puerto Rican Baby Mama  calls him a "pendejo." A little black boy around 2 years old  (probably named " Day Day")  who has raggedy ass cornrows in his head, but has on  a brand new pair of Jordans was running all over the place.

    I sat amidst the chaos waiting for them r to call our name so we can eat and leave. They called our name. Dinner went rather smooth to my surprise. The highlight of the evening was, when my moms boyfriend went to the bathroom.  We called the waiter over and ordered a slice of B-day cake and asked them to sing that embarrassing song they sing with all the other waiters. The waiter then told us that they don't do that anymore. Of course I had to know why. (Brace yourself  And he told me that that Red Lobster Restaurant had to stop doing that because when all the waiters would gather around the Birthday person to sing. All of the people at the Bar, and in the from of the restaurant would run out the door without paying!"  I was in tears with laughter. And I was angry at the same time. Why didn't I ever think about doing that? That sounds like something that would've crossed my mind. " Two more rounds for me. Oh and lets get a birthday cake for that table over there in the back in 20 minutes. " HAAAAAA!  Genius!  Anyways we ended up going to Carvel on the way home.  And I took 4 cheesy biscuits to go. 

Posted by thatrudegirl at 09:17 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

Con: Occasionally I look like a ghost in my pictures.

Pro: I don’t have to stay out the sun in the summertime.

Con: I bruise easily.

Pro: I avoided many spankings as a kid because I bruise so easily.

 Con: I have to scrub my neck with alcohol so it doesn't look dingy.

 Pro: I don't need to use Ambi.

Con: I get stains on the corners of my mouth when drinking the following from a glass: Kool-Aid, Hawaiian Punch, Grape Soda, Grape Juice, etc.

Pro: When I get ashy it doesn’t show.

Con: People always coming up to me talking spanish (no hablo espanol nigga)

Pro: I can change my race whenever it’s convenient (ie: the cab driver is domincan, all of a sudden hey I’m dominican too and save 5 dollars off my fare. "MI abuela es de Punta Cana") It’s also great for when black people get ignant, and when approached by pan handlers 3 key words "no habla ingles."

Con: Occasionally I still get some people who hate on me and say that tired ass line "you think you are better than me juz cuz you "light skint" "(when really I am just better than them, becasue I am just better than them)

Pro: I’m just light enough to appeal to whitey and infiltrate their territory, but still maintain a level of threat that is associated with being black. ( So, they know not to fuck with me. )

Con: I can’t wear the following colors: taupe, beige, tan, nude, natural, or any color that is similar to that of a card board box. Otherwise, I look naked.

Pro: I have prejudiced southern relatives who give me preferential treatment over my darker counter parts. (Yeah it’s wrong but shoot..I get the big piece of corn bread!!!)

Con: In order to keep this preferential treatment I can’t procreate with anyone darker than me. (According to them it took us 400 years to achieve my complexion and me producing a dark offspring would send us back to the cotton fields)

Pro: "Light skint" women never go out of style.(Opposed to light skin brothers that went out in the 90’s)

Con: My complexion is also associated with middle eastern descent. (So I always have to arrive to the airport 2 hours early to go through that random security screening....Random My Ass!!!)

Posted by thatrudegirl at 09:15 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)